I’ll bet this didn’t happen to you today

I’ll bet you didn’t do laundry on a cloudy day even though you knew it would take forever to dry because you really had to wash all that stuff that got puked on last night.  I’ll bet you didn’t eye the sky and decide to hang it on the racks outside because it didn’t REALLY look like rain.  I’ll bet you didn’t suddenly hear a downpour outside the window and rush out to snatch up the laundry racks and heave them in the back door to finish drying in your kitchen.  I’ll bet you didn’t hastily cover up the sandbox and dart back inside dripping wet only to see what looked exactly like a hummingbird flittering around your kitchen.  I’ll bet you didn’t yell, “There’s a hummingbird in the house!” and experience a moment of total panic wondering how the **** you get a live hummingbird out of the house into the rain.  I’ll bet you didn’t see said “hummingbird” land only to realize it was actually a ginormous moth that had probably been sleeping in the drying laundry.  I’ll bet you didn’t say, “Never mind!  It’s a big moth!” causing even greater panic in your daughter, who has apparently decided to be terrified of moths.  I’ll bet you didn’t decide that there was no way to get it out alive and then grab the flyswatter and realize belatedly that the moth was as big as the flyswatter.  I’ll bet you didn’t dance around your kitchen trying to kill the giant moth before your daughter had hysterics.  I’ll bet you didn’t see the dog sniffing at it curiously and secretly hope he would just kill and eat it and take care of the problem.  I’ll bet you didn’t mentally curse him out when he wandered off uselessly.  I’ll bet you didn’t think you’d killed the moth at last only to have it fly up in your face as soon as you approached it.  I’ll bet you didn’t finally corner and kill it and dump it in the trash while feeling guilty because it was so big it was nothing like swatting a fly but rather more like murdering a…well, a hummingbird.  I’ll bet you didn’t look out the window to discover that the rain shower had only lasted about three minutes and everything outside was already dry again.

Sigh.

Posted 2/9/2011 at 3:40 PM

6 Comments

Oh the Chaos!!!!

Posted 2/9/2011 at 7:18 PM by crabtrees

“i’ll bet this didn’t happen to you today” is the highlight of my day.  sorry.
and, yes, total chaos.

Posted 2/9/2011 at 8:26 PM by cmanahan

BAHAHAHA!  I needed this..thanks.  Now, I’ll go wipe the tears from my eyes from just reading this aloud to Jeremiah 🙂

Posted 2/9/2011 at 9:13 PM by SinginMama

WOW!  Umm.  You are correct.  That totally didn’t happen to me today.  🙂

Posted 2/9/2011 at 10:8 PM by brahamcrackers

I can’t believe it happened to you! To anyone! Moths that can be mistaken for birds!!!!????

No thank you.But thank you for the laugh 🙂

Posted 2/10/2011 at 10:49 AM by The3wigs

I feel guilty for laughing so hard.  I couldn’t help it.  The vision of Ellie losing it over a giant moth!  I’ve actually seen an insect so big I thought it was a hummimgbird, too.  I love you Deb.

Posted 2/12/2011 at 8:2 AM by andidunlevy

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